The Last Chat
by Jenny Giles
Summary: Is Jenny communicating with Giles beyond her grave? (This is my first story and it's silly. I'd appreciate tips and polite critisism but please be kind)


The day she died, his heart slowly began to deteriorate. At first he was strong, he made all of the arrangements for her funeral and made all the final decisions. Her clan hadn't cared really, she was just someone to protect their interests. So he had done everything, as painful as it was. Buffy had offered to help him, but he felt as though doing it made him closer to her. After the funeral was over and a week or so had passed, his strong exterior began to melt away. Buffy would come by for training and he would make up flimsy excuses why he couldn't. He either had paper work to do, or he was working on something for another teacher. Buffy knew that was a lie, Giles had gone out of his way to stay away from just about everyone so she didn't push it. She knew he sat in his office most of the time. He just sat there and thought about her; about her laugh and her smile...about everything that made her Jenny. What she didn't know is what he did when he actually did go home.  
  
Giles slowly walked up the path to his front door. As he entered his home, just like every other evening since Jenny's death, he saw the damned rose petals on his stairs and heard the soft sound of music that wasn't there. Shaking his head lightly, the rose petals and music slowly drifted away. Sometimes he wouldn't shake it away, he would imagine that it was all happening again, only this time Jenny really was waiting for him, alive and safe. He didn't have the strength for dreaming tonight. He slowly ascended the stairs and opened his bedroom door. It hadn't been hard for him to come back and sleep in the room he had found Jenny in. He actually felt better when he was in his room, away from everyone else, just he and Jenny. He would take off his vest and shoes, and curl up on the bed where Jenny had been so carelessly laid. He rarely slept, he just laid there and thought about her; tried to smell or hear her. Somehow he made it to the morning, and he rose to start his day over.  
  
It was fourth period before Giles got a break from researching a new demon in town. Buffy had actually gone to P.E. for once, so he was all alone in the library. He knew the computer room was usually empty this hour, because it was Jen...Willow's study period. Deciding he needed to be in her world for awhile, he grabbed his cup of coffee and headed up stairs.  
  
Willow was about to go back to the computer lab to continue a lesson she was working on, but when she saw Giles enter somberly, she decided to give him some time alone it what was Jenny's sanctuary.  
  
Being around computers always used to make Giles squirm. Now they gave him a good feeling, as though she were still there with him. She had taught him how to chat before...well before they found about her past. He had actually enjoyed it, except for the ads that kept popping up about FREE XXX! She had laughed at him when he cursed the computer for displaying such foul material. He smiled as he thought about that day at her home. Shaking his head, he decided to get back onto the chat room she had showed him. Sitting down at a computer, he logged on just as she had shown him. He was afraid he would forget some of the instructions, but he couldn't have forgotten one word she'd said, even if he tried.  
  
When he was finally signed on and on the website with the room lists, he scrolled down hoping to find a room about books. He was in the middle of the list when he saw a room called "Lost Lovers." Deciding it couldn't hurt to look, he clicked join chat under the name gileslurvsjen. Jenny had signed him up under this name as a joke, but he had never felt the need to change it. He jumped right into reading the conversation, even though he was only the fourth person to join the chat.  
  
sweetsam0404 says: I recently lost my husband in a train vs. car accident. he was 46 years old. I know a little about what you're going through Hank072tall. We didn't have any children though. How are you daughters taking it?  
  
Hank072tall says: They're taking it about as well as can be expected I guess. Of course the little one doesn't realize what's going on, she just knows mommy is in heaven with God now. Maggie is older and knows mommy isn't coming back, and that seems to be the only thing she can focus on. Not that I blame her...it's just I wish she would turn to the church like I have. It has really helped.  
  
sweetsam0404 says: I guess that's the other difference between us. I actually turned away from my church when I found out about Jim. I think I blamed God.  
  
Hank072tall says: I understand perfectly. Instead of blaming God, I blamed myself for awhile. I think that's what most people do, try to find someone to blame. hey, we have two people in here who have jumped in. are you there angel98 and gileslurvsjen?  
  
**Giles was a little baffled as to what to do for a moment, and he considered just signing off, but something was keeping him in the chat room. Maybe it would help to talk to these people.**  
  
gileslurvsjen says: Yes I'm here. Sorry, I don't usually chat, I was just following your conversation.  
  
sweetsam0404 says: Oh that's okay, I know it can be hard to open up sometimes. Have you lost someone you love? We're all here to share and listen, but don't feel like you have to.  
  
gileslurvsjen says: Actually, I was thinking it might be good for me to talk about it. I really haven't let anyone close since it happened. My...um...good friend was murdered two weeks ago.  
  
Hank072tall says: That's horrible. Natural death is hard enough to deal with, but I can't imagine having someone murdered.  
  
sweetsam0404 says: Is your friend this Jenny in your sign in name?  
  
gileslurvsjen says: Yes, and I love...loved her very much.  
  
angel98 says: I'm sure she loved you, too.  
  
Hank072tall says: She speaks! Listen, I wish you all the best but the baby should be waking up anytime, so I had better go.  
  
sweetsam0404 says: Yes, I think I should get going, also. Bless you all! Goodbye  
  
*sweetsam0404 has signed off*  
  
Hank072tall says: Bye all, may our Lord be with you always  
  
*hank072tall has signed off*  
  
angel98 says: are you still there gileslurvsjen?  
  
gileslurvsjen says: Yes, I'm still here.  
  
angel98 says: good, I wanted to give you a piece of advice if I may.  
  
gileslurvsjen says: Go right ahead, I could use some at this point.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
angel98 says: Don't focus on her death. Focus on her life and the time she spent with you. Remember all the happy times you had with her, and even remember the not so happy times. Remember your fights about silly things, and remember goofy looks you would send back and worth. Don't cry over her or be depressed anymore, be happy and make her time on earth mean something. Fufill your destiny, and when your time comes, you will be reunited with her for eternity. You'll be able to hold her in your arms and tell her everything is okay, and that you'll never be seperated from her again. And you'll finally get to tell her that you love her, and she'll say she already knew, because she does. She knows how much you love and miss her, and she wishes she could make all of your hurt just melt away. But she can't. So you have to be strong, and go on. You have to be okay for your friends, and you have to be okay for her to be okay. I have to go now, but I wanted to tell you one more thing. Your fate rests in a yellow square, find it and everything will be okay. Find the yellow square.  
  
*angel98 has signed off*  
  
Giles sat in shock staring at the computer for what seemed like hours. Then his head fell into his hands and he cried harder than he had the day Jenny died. Before brushing away his tears, he reached to flick the computer off. A beep made him stop. Looking at the screen, he read what had shown up while his head was in his hands.  
  
*angel98 has signed on*  
  
angel98 says: P.S. I can't believe you haven't changed your screen name yet!!  
  
*angel98 has signed off*  
  
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To be or not to be continued?? Depends on feedback! 


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